Screw It, I'm Building a Swing: Fence Stage Three

You know what they say, when you're building a fence and life gives you lemons, throw them at the cops and build a swing instead. They, in this sentence, are correct.

Guess we have to wait for a bit to finish building our Optimus playpen. It's been a rough day, I'm tired but I need to keep working on things, so naturally I decide I need to build a swing. 70 feet of 5/8" polypropylene braided rope and a left over decking board later, I'm ready. Pull out the extension ladder, extend it all the way out to it's 20' maximum, lean it safely up against the big branch I can actually reach with that ladder on the pecan tree, and scamper up.

Umm, so, this ladder is bouncing around and waving a lot under my 200+ lb frame. My engineering background says the 225 lb (with tools and gear) limit printed on the side of the ladder has a couple safety factors built in, but the aforementioned logic center of my brain is conspicuously absent now. Anyways, refocus, time to wrap the rope around and tie it off....then, disaster strikes.

I really do not know how to tie knots.

Seriously, stop laughing. Despite my mechanical disposition and proficiency with every tool on the planet, I never learned how to properly tie knots. I was the kid who was shown how, then would just make up my own special knot that was 10 times bigger and uglier and impossible to untie or use for anything. Fat lot of good that does now. Guess I get to go search the interweb for the proper way to tie a freaking knot. All I wanted to do was play on a swing today, come on.

Unfortunately, with the multitude of other projects going on in this house, as soon as I went inside I found three other things to work on. Instead of learning what every 8-yr-old cub scout already knows, I decided I need to finish slathering joint compound on the ceiling around the new junction boxes, installing another light fixture where there previously was no light, then finish wiring up a couple more fans. Plus, I was sick of getting hit in the face by that loose wire. And that tiny bird perching on it.

Still, the rope lays on the ground as a stark reminder to learn how to tie a knot, so that I can play on my swing. I'm awesome.


Currently listening to "Bad Company" by Five Finger Death Punch (my apologies to Jessie and to Bad Company)

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